The Springfield Files
| "The Springfield Files" | |
|---|---|
| The Simpsons episode | |
| File:3g01.jpg | |
| Episode no. | Season 8 |
| Directed by | Steven Dean Moore |
| Written by | Reid Harrison |
| Original air dates | January 12, 1997 |
| Episode features | |
| Chalkboard gag | "The truth is not out there" |
| Couch gag | Homer, Marge, Bart, and Lisa fly in the room with backpack rockets and sit on the couch. Maggie flies in wildly, makes a few loops, and lands on Marge's lap |
The Springfield Files is an episode of The Simpsons. Its guest stars are Leonard Nimoy and The X-Files stars David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson.
Synopsis
Template:Spoiler In this episode, Leonard Nimoy is hosting a show about alien encounters. He begins talking about an encounter in a town called Springfield...
Friday has arrived. At Moe's, Homer drinks over ten beers of "Red Tick Beer", a brand that has dogs swim in it. He takes a breathalyzer test which declares he is as drunk as Boris Yeltsin and he decides to walk home. However, Homer takes the wrong path and ends up in the woods. In a clearing, he sees a glowing thin-boned alien. Homer panics and runs away screaming.
No one in the Simpson family believes Homer's story, and his attempts to report the alien to the local police are dismissed. Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully of the FBI go to their house to investigate. Mulder's FBI ID photo is of him reclining in his underwear in a suggestive pose. After no results from their psychological tests, Homer fails to provide any proof he actually did see an alien. Homer is ridiculed by most of the neighbourhood, especially Lisa, but Bart says that he believes Homer. The next Friday night, they camp out in the clearing (with Ned Flanders' camping equipment) and they both see the alien, who promises peace before Homer scares him away. Bart captures the entire incident on tape (with Flanders' camera).
With Homer and Bart celebrating with evidence of the alien in hand, Leonard Nimoy says "Good-night" to the viewers. He is then reminded the show still has ten minutes left by an offscreen Squeaky Voiced Teen, at which point he runs to his car and leaves. The Squeaky Voiced Teen takes over for Nimoy in his narrating duties.
Although Bart's tape is only three seconds long and is mostly static, everyone in Springfield believes Homer (though Lisa is still skeptical). Friday comes again and all Springfielders go to the clearing (among them Leonard Nimoy). Sure enough, the alien appears, promising love. The Springfielders begin to riot when Lisa shows that the "alien" is actually Mr. Burns. Smithers states that Burns receives longevity treatment once a week; this leaves him twisted and disoriented (and a sweet heavenly voice). Back to his normal self, Burns renounce the promises of peace and love he said. He then receives a booster from Dr. Nick and everyone sings "Good Morning Starshine".
We are taken back to Squeaky Voiced Teen, who ends Nimoy's show and mispronounces "skies".
Trivia
- Moe's Breathalyzer test:
- Boris Yeltsin (most alcoholic)
- Stinkin'
- Soused
- Tipsy (least alcoholic)
- Homer apparently doesn't consider 10 beers to be "drinking."
- A newspaper has the headline "Human Blimp Sees Flying Saucer".
- Homer shares the same birthday as Santa's Little Helper.
- Some of the aliens featured in the FBI lineup:
- Marvin the Martian
- Chewbacca
- ALF
- One of the aliens sometimes featured on the show, either Kang or Kodos
- When Mulder shows people his FBI badge, it has a picture of himself only wearing a speedo next to it.
Cultural references
- Chewbacca is in the scene where everyone sings together.
- Moe is seen to be hiding Shamu in the back room of Moe's Tavern, and immediately worries when agents Mulder and Scully appear at the bar, telling his accommplices that "The gig is up. We gotta get Shamu back to Sea World." He is later seen towards the end of the episode trying to move the whale on his back, asking "Who'd have thought a whale could be this heavy?".
- Donkey Kong is seen at the beginning of the episode throwing barrels.
- In the scene where Scully gives Homer a lie detector test, the Cigarette Smoking Man (a character from the X-Files) is seen in the background.
- A spoof of Better Homes and Gardens magazine is shown, as Better Homes Than Yours.
- The "dog birthday" gag is almost word-for-word identical to one featured earlier in an episode of Married... with Children
Quotes
- Leonard Nimoy: Good evening, I'm Leonard Nimoy. The following tale of alien encounters is true. And by true I mean false. It's all lies. But they're entertaining lies. And in the end, isn't that the truth? The answer is - "no".
- Arcade Owner: (speaking about Donkey Kong) He's just not a draw anymore.
(Donkey Kong replies by throwing a barrel at him and bowling him over.)
Arcade Owner:Hey! He's still got it!". - Milhouse is stood in front of Kevin Costner's Waterworld - the video game in an arcade
Milhouse: 38...39...40 quarters! This had better be good!
Virtual Kevin Costner takes a single step on screen. The words "Game Over" then appear.
Computer game:Game over. Please deposit 40 quarters.
Milhouse: What a rip! *pause* 1...2...3...4... - Mulder: Look at this, Scully: there has been another unsubstantiated UFO sighting in the heartland of America. We've got to get there right away.
Scully: Well, gee Mulder, there's also this report of a shipment of drugs and illegal weapons coming into New Jersey tonight.
Mulder: (scoffs) I hardly think the FBI is concerned with matters like that. - Mulder: Agents Mulder and Scully. (sinister) FBI.
- Homer: I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around the city, keeping its speed over fifty. And if its speed dropped, the bus would explode! I think it was called... "The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down."
- Jasper: Thank God it's Wednesday. (takes his pills)
Mrs. Glick: It's Friday.
Jasper: Uh-oh. Wrong pills. (hair covers Jasper's entire body) Uh, little help? - Homer: The alien has a sweet heavenly voice...like Urkel. And he appears every Friday night...like Urkel.
Wiggum: Wow, your story is really compelling Mr. Jackass, I mean Simpson. So I'll just write it up on my invisible typewriter.
Homer: You don't have to humilate me!
Homer leaves. A charred man flicking a cigarette lighter covered in ash enters.
Pyromaniac: I just torched a building downtown and I'm afraid I'll do it again!
Wiggum: Just let me type that up on my invisible typewritter (Wiggum hums to himself). Fruitcake! - Rev. Lovejoy: I remember another gentle visitor from the Heavens. He came in peace, and then died, only to come back to life. And his name was...E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial. (sniff) I love that little guy.
- Scully: This is the worst assignment we've ever had.
Mulder: Worse than the time we were attacked by the flesh-eating virus?
Grandpa:(Grandpa chasing a turtle with his dentures) OW, he bit me with my own teeth!
Scully: This is much more irritating. - Homer: I'll be happy to answer any questions about the alien. Any question at all. Dr. Hibbert?
Dr. Hibbert: Yes. Is the alien carbon-based or silicon-based?
Homer: Uh, the second one. Xylophone. Next question.
Barney: Is the alien Santa Claus?
Homer: Uh, yeah.
Ned: Were you on my roof last night, stealing my weather vane?
Homer: This interview is over!
(slams the door shut. Ned's weather vane then lands in front of the crowd) - Dr. Nick: You won't feel a thing (holds up a painful looking device) until I jam this down your throat.
- Homer (holding a "Homer is Right" T-Shirt): Take a look at this, Lisa. You don't see any "Homer is a Dope" T-shirts, do you?
Shirt Guy: We sold those out in five minutes.
Homer: D'oh! (sees Marge wearing a "Homer is a Dope" shirt) Marge, how could you?
Marge: These shirts are 100% cotton and look at the fine stitching on "dope".
Homer: I'll take two. - Bart: Leonard Nimoy, what are you doing here?
Leonard Nimoy: Wherever there is mystery and the unexplained, cosmic forces shall draw me near.
Sarcastic middle-aged man: Hey Spock, what do want on your hot dog?
Leonard Nimoy: Surprise me.
(man slaps a lot of relish on the hot dog) - Kent Brockman: The alien has appeared in the same area the last two Friday nights. Will it appear this Friday? The entire Channel 6 News team will be there, except Bill the boom-mic operator who's getting fired tomorrow.
(He then gets hit in the head with a boom-mic)
Kent (to someone off camera): Very unprofessional, Bill. - Leonard Nimoy: And from this simple man came the truth that we are not alone in the universe. I'm Leonard Nimoy. Good night.
Squeaky Voiced Teen (off-camera): Uh, Mr. Nimoy, we still have ten minutes left.
Leonard Nimoy: Oh, uh, well, let me get something out of my car.
(runs off camera; we then hear a car starting and driving off)
Squeaky Voiced Teen: I don't think he's coming back. - Bart (enters the dining room with spring eyes and a water gun): I am the Thing from Your-anus (sic)!
Homer: Oh, it's only Bart. I can't believe it. I'm being mocked by my own children! On my birthday!
Bart: It's your birthday?
Homer: Yeah. Don't you know? It's the same day as the dog's.
Lisa: Santa's Little Helper, it's your birthday?! Oh, we gotta give we a present! Oh yes, we do! (hugs the dog)
Bart (hugging the dog): We love you, boy.
Marge: Good doggie! Good doggie!
Homer (under his breath): Lousy lovable dog! - Marge: Homer, have you been drinking?
Homer: No! Well, ten beers. - Frogs: Bud... Weis... Er... Bud... Weis...
Alligator: (eats the frogs) Coors. - (Chasing a turtle who has gotten hold of his teeth)
Grampa Simpson: Come back here! Slow down!
(Grampa reaches for his teeth, but the turtle bites him)
Grampa Simpson: Ow! He bit me with my own teeth! - Mulder: Are we alone in the universe? Impossible, when you consider the wonders that exist all around us... (much later) voodoo priests of Haiti, the Tibetan numerologists of Appalachia, the unsolved mysteries of Unsolved Mysteries... The truth is out there! (in the background, Moe and his friends carry Shamu the killer whale on their backs)
Moe: Oh God. Who would've thought a whale would be this heavy? (sees Mulder looking at them) Jeez, it's the Feds! (they run off as the whale groans) - (Scully observes Homer running on a treadmill with wires attached to him.)
Mulder: Wait a minute Scully, what's the point of this test?
Scully: No point. I just thought he could stand to lose a little weight.
Mulder: (staring at Homer) His jiggling is almost hypnotic.
Scully: Yes, it's like a lava lamp. - Homer: Good. If you believe me, then I'm not giving up. This Friday, we'll go into the woods and find that alien!
Bart: What if we don't?
Homer: We'll fake it and sell it to the Fox network.
Bart (laughs): They'll buy anything!
Homer: Now, son, they do a lot of quality programming too. (beat, then Homer and Bart burst into laughter) - Mr. Burns: A lifetime of working at a nuclear power plant has given me a healthy green glow... and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner.
- Mulder: All right, Homer. We want you to re-create your every move the night you saw this alien.
Homer: Well, the evening began at the gentleman's club, where we were discussing Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon.
Scully: Mr. Simpson, it's a felony to lie to the F.B.I.
Homer: We were sitting in Barney's car eating packets of mustard. There, you happy?
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